07 October 2005

Health problem stamped out

The modern practice of selling self-adhesive stamps has resulted in many people resorting to licking other, often quite inappropriate, items, the Consumers' Association reports. A particular safety issue has been highlighted in households fitted with roller blinds.
The phenomenon of conventional postage has, until now, completely masked the problem of uncontrollable lick urges. Approximately 35% of the population suffers from this embarrassing condition, according to some estimates (although other estimates put the figure as low as 0.0000002%). Email is largely to blame, removing not only the much loved stamp, but also the traditional craftsman-built envelope.
The issue only came to light following a Department of Health report into the dramatic increase in admissions into this country's hospitals of people with roller-blind related injuries. According to Dr Alva Drop, DoH spokesman: "Some simply have minor singeing around the ears, while others have much more serious injuries. One man ended up with a tongue more than 15 feet long."